20+ Effective Tips on How to Be a Good Wife
It is easy to fall in love and get married, but it takes a lot of hard work to make your marriage work out. After you are married, there is a high possibility of your relationship losing its sparks as marriages can sometimes be demanding. But a good marriage is all about having the right mindset and adopting a few lifestyle changes.
If you are recently married and wondering how to be a good wife, wonder no more. Many people have plenty of suggestions on how you can be a good wife. However, all those things might not work for everyone because every marriage is unique. So, keeping that in mind, we have enlisted some universal tips that can be useful to all on how to be a good wife.
1. Be Warm and Affectionate
Do you love your husband? If you have committed to spending a lifetime with him, you certainly must love him. However, love isn't always enough, being warm and showing affection is equally important. You don't have to do grand gestures to make them feel loved. Simple pecks and random hugs are also a sweet way to show love to your partner.
We often focus too much on our work and worries, that we sometimes leave our partner wondering if we love them or not. This lack of affection will result in feeling indifferent and unloved which isn't good for a healthy marriage. So, don't let this be the case in your marriage and always be warm towards your partner.
2. Be Understanding
Try to be understanding even when things are rough. Being an understanding wife, however, doesn't necessarily mean you need to tolerate pain and abuse. A good wife understands that no one is perfect, and our husband isn't any exception, and never judges him.
But if you understand the weakness and insecurities of your husband, and accept him for who he is, it can resolve a lot of issues before even they occur. Try to understand your partner and value them as this would benefit your marriage overall.
3. Know His Love Language
Love language is a way of expressing your love and also tells a lot about how you want to be loved. Knowing and understanding your partner's love language helps you improve communication and build a better connection with him. Identifying the correct way of how he wants to experience love takes a lot of frustration and issues out of a relationship.
A licensed clinical psychologist and certified mediator, Avigail Lev, Psy.D, says "When we know how we experience love and also understand the ways that our partner experiences love, it helps us create a healthy, meaningful, and authentic connection." So learn and implement your partner's love language for a happy marriage.
In any relationship, proper communication plays a vital role in maintaining a healthy relationship. One can never know what their significant other is thinking or feeling, so having an open conversation with your husband allows him to know how you feel. Don't shut your husband saying, You never know my feelings when he asks "What happened?"
Being able to communicate properly helps you express your feelings without getting angry or annoyed and this is extremely important in a healthy relationship. Giving silent treatment will only make things worse so talk to your husband, have open communication, and discuss your feelings.
5. Be Supportive
Another thing that you can do to be a good wife is support your partner's dreams and goals like your own. Even the strongest person needs support, and our husbands are no exception. Sometimes just having someone by your side, and listening to them makes a huge impact, so you should try to support him even when things are hard.
Support doesn't always involve finances. Sometimes it means believing in their goals and pushing them to work towards them and sometimes it means to listening them rant. Being a supportive partner means being their friend, and their personal cheerleader when they are at their lowest. Try to support your partner and encourage them as this would benefit your relationship overall.
6. Respect Him
If you are looking for answers to how to become a good wife, the first and foremost thing that you must do is respect him. When a wife respects her husband, it means she appreciates him, admires him, and supports him unconditionally.
Everyone is a unique individual, with their own strengths and weaknesses. You should never belittle or humiliate him for his flaws, whether in private or in public as doing so can result in making your husband feel embarrassed or insecure. So, no matter what happens, respect and sing his praises.
7. Be Healthy Together
A good wife never lets her husband live an unhealthy life. She encourages and motivates her husband to develop healthy habits such as eating balanced food, and exercising regularly in order to live a healthy life. The best part? You can do this together, after all, a healthy life is a happy life.
You can be a better wife by supporting your husband to take care of his mental and physical well-being. You can do this by eating healthy food together, going to yoga and meditation classes together, or even encouraging him to get professional help, and going together to see a therapist.
8. Share Financial Responsibilities
The qualities of a good wife also include sharing financial responsibilities with her husband. Don't leave the financial burden entirely on your husband. Try to take matters into your own hands, and share the responsibility together as a couple.
Just like a good husband never allows his family to go through financial hurdles, the same way a good wife will never burden the husband with finances. She will be financially independent, and lend a hand to her husband to provide for the family. Even if she isn't financially independent, she will utilize the money carefully, focus on savings, and not give any financial burden to her husband with worthless demands.
9. Respect His Need for Space
It feels good to have someone by your side all the time, but sometimes all you want is some alone time or some fun moments with your friends. Respect his need for space and give him that. Allow him to live his individual life, without stop restricting him from things. Restricting him all the time can make him feel suffocating for them and can affect the relationship negatively.
Remember that space doesn't necessarily mean physical or emotional distance. It means being able to do things that you like without anyone budging you constantly. Having some time apart also makes you appreciate your partner more, so let him go to that boy's outing without nagging much.
10. Appreciate Him
Building a happy marriage requires constant efforts to appreciate your partner. Appreciating him is a way to make him feel special and loved. You can do this by giving him compliments frequently or surprising him with a gift or a handwritten note. This will make your partner feel valued and will make your partner love you more.
Not acknowledging or appreciating your partner can be emotionally tiring for them. This can lead to feeling worthless, so make a habit of appreciating your husband for everything that he does for you and the family. Showing appreciation is a great way to let them know that you respect their existence, and are grateful to have them in your life.
11. Take Care of Yourself
This is the most important trait of being a good wife. You cannot take care of someone else if you cannot take care of yourself. You will be a good wife to your partner if you are a good friend to yourself. If you cannot love yourself, you will have a hard time believing that someone else can love you.
A person can truly love the other person if they can love themself first, after all, "You cannot pour from an empty cup." So, groom yourself, eat healthy, and get that manicure and pedicure. Love yourself, and be emotionally independent so that you can help your partner grow instead of dragging them down with your self-doubt.
12. Have Healthy Arguments
All relationships face conflicts at one point in their time. What matters is how we argue and how we handle the situation. The arguments need to be healthy, for a happy marriage. If the argument is heated, there is a high chance of it turning into a major conflict. So, a good wife should always focus on healthy arguments.
If you want to be a good wife, you will have to find subtle ways to disagree with your partner. Along with this, one should learn to be patient and attentive during arguments. A good wife will know how to resolve a conflict most healthily. Whether it is a small argument or a big one, a person who is respectful even during arguments is a marriage-material person.
13. Avoid Nagging
This may sound old-fashioned, but if you want to be a good wife, don't nag your partner. We don't like it when someone pesters or nags us continuously, and our husbands are no exception. Be subtle, and ask him to do things in a polite way. If he forgets, you can use technology and keep a reminder on his phone.
Nagging too much can make your partner feel insecure. If you nag someone continuously, it can bring bitterness and negativity to the relationship. So, throw your nagging habit away, instead communicate with your partner, and send small reminders in an elegant way.
14. Love His Family
Marriage doesn't just happen between a husband and wife. It happens between two families. Adjusting to a new family can be difficult, but a good wife will make genuine efforts to adjust to her husband's side of the family and accept them as her own.
When he sees you being invested in your family, he will love you more and will also be caring towards your side of the family. By caring for your husband's family, not will you gain your husband's trust but also get his family's love and you will end up having two beautiful families.
15. Learn To Forgive
Learning to forgive and forget is one of the most important traits of a good wife. There are going to be small, silly fights in a marriage, but if you know how to let go of things, it will help save your relationship and marriage.
Forgiving and forgetting will help you rise above the hurdles, and make your bond stronger. Not only will it benefit your mental health, but will also make you a bigger person. It may take some time to develop this habit, but once it is developed, it will benefit your marriage overall.
16. Learn to Compromise
A good wife always looks for ideas for common ground in a healthy marriage. She is willing to give up things just for the sake of her husband's happiness. But at the same time, she doesn't give up her individual identity as a woman. She finds a balance to meet her husband halfway when they don't agree on certain things.
It is very important to keep the marriage above your personal needs, and a good partner never fails to do that. When there is a marriage between two different people, there are going to be disagreements, it is upon you to resolve those conflicts peacefully with a compromise or let the conflict be bigger with no compromise.
17. Be Loyal
Loyalty is the best thing that you can give to anyone. If there is no loyalty in a relationship, the relationship becomes weak and a mess. In a loyal relationship, you can easily share your feelings and secrets, which will help create a strong bond with your partner.
If there is no loyalty in the relationship, there will be constant nagging and bickering. This will make the relationship toxic, and you will not feel safe in the relationship. You need to shower the relationship with things that you want to experience. So, if you want to be a good human and a good wife, be loyal to your partner and everyone around you.
18. Spend Quality Time Together
A good wife makes an effort to spend some quality time together with her husband, without any stress. She plans fun things like traveling together, making a vision board, going on fun dates, and even silly things like dancing together and creating a playlist. A good wife ensures that these fun elements end up being a recurring event and not a one-time thing.
She may also share some hobbies with her partner, in order to be able to spend quality time together. You don't need to do big things, simply cooking him his favorite meal and having a candlelight dinner is also enough. But what matters the most is the effort that you put into spending quality time with your husband.
19. Prioritize Your Relationship
It is very difficult to make time for your partner in this busy schedule. After marriage people often take their partner for granted and spend less time with them. But not everyone understands that this lack of attention is what makes a relationship fall out.
Even if he is already yours, if you want to be a good wife, you should consistently make efforts to make your relationship your priority. You can do this by coming home on time from the office, and not bringing your office to your home. A happy marriage requires constant hard work, and it can be done by prioritizing your relationship with your husband.
20. Have Fun
A good wife makes the relationship more fun and happy. If you want to have a long-lasting marriage, it is very important to have fun and not let the spark die. Don't sweat the little things, let it go and enjoy your present moment.
Minor issues keep coming up in marriages but don't get too stuck on them or in your work. Make time for your partner. Take some time off, go on cute little dates, tease each other, have fun, and relax. You should stop being serious all the time, enjoy your marriage, and make each other laugh while you still can.
21. Trust Your Partner
Trust is the most valuable gift that you can give to your partner. Trust in a relationship helps the relationship grow. However, if there is no trust, it is very difficult to maintain a relationship. Trust is the foundation of a happy relationship, and if it is not there, the relationship becomes a mess.
A good wife trusts her husband and never plays silly games like going through his phone when he is not around or checking his location. She asks questions because she cares and not because she doubts. No matter how long you are together, a lack of trust can make your relationship fall apart, so one should never doubt their partner.
22. Don't Stop Showing Your Love
A good wife never stops showing her love to her husband. Even after knowing that she has already won him and he is all hers, she will still chase him. In order to keep the spark alive in a relationship, this is extremely important. Showing your love should never have an expiry date.
You can show love to your husband by saying I love you every day, taking him out on random dates, and surprising him with his favorite meal. Trust me, a husband will never get tired of hearing genuine I love you. Showing your love is a way of letting your partner know that you cherish them. So, don't think much and surprise your husband with a random date.